Tuesday, January 02, 2007

h, the monday that should be but isn't but could be if it wasn't

That's right...the day after the day after new YEARS eve....after being away from my office for 10 days, ten WONDERFUL, GLORIOUS, FANTASTIC, INCREDIBLE days fill with family and friends and the things I love, I decided, based on the need for healthcare and income, to return to work. I woke up to the sweet sounds of a staticy clock radio--seems the last time I used the alarm clock was just before I dusted--having hit the dial which resulted in the sweetly sounding crackleshshshshcrackleshshshhsh
shshshsh wake up donkey sound....i bolted upright.....okay, so my hand bolted upright and came smashing down on the snooze button--they need to make it bigger. I got up.....grabbed my bathrobe, opened my door, stepped out of my room, the door closed behind me, catching part of my bathrobe...two steps and i was spinning like a top trying to figure out who was messin' with me so early in the morning. Stupid door. Cursed inanimate objects.

I stumbled down stairs.

I forgot to make coffee. UGH. I start the coffee process. Fill the pot. empty the pot into the coffee maker. Put the coffee in the grinder. Grind the coffee. Scoop the coffee into the coffee maker. SON OF A......reread what I just wrote, starting with Fill the pot. Yes. I forgot the filter!!! Empty the coffee out. Clean the coffee holder. Put the filter in the coffee holder. Add coffee, hit the start button. Hop in the shower. get out of the shower. Shave. Go get a cup of...SON OF A...i hit timed brew, not brew now....figures. I hit brew.....go upstairs, get dressed....the door is playing nice now, thankfully. I go down stairs. I pour a swwweeeeet cup of coffee. Sweet....Glorious....Mud....mmmm. I get in the car. I start driving. Where are all the crazy people coming from????? How does one rear end an ambulance? i Mean, really. But hey, someone did. Luckily emergency response units were already on the scene.

I find my blood pressure rising the closer i get to my office. This isn't healthy. I get to my desk. I can't remember my password. 10 times...locked out....I call the help desk, remembering my password as I make my way through press 3 for more options, press 4 for more options, press 3825 to speak to an operator (look at the letters on 3825...bet you can guess what 4 letter word I spelled out).....I tell them I forgot my password, but I remember it now, and I need them to unlock my account. She says, "we can reset your password for you." I said, "i know my password...i mean, I couldn't then, but I remember it now, i just need them to unlock it." She resets my password for me.....3825 3825 3825.......i go through the pleasurable process of redoing my password, (no words more than 3 letters, must contain alpha-numeric in the first 4 characters, no repetition or letter number substitution, must be 13 characters long and not repeat any patterns in the previous 7 passwords.....). Password successfully set. I couldn't remember what it accepted.....rinse wash repeat the entire paragraph.

I finally log in. I go to refill my coffee. I pour a tall cup from my thermos (saving money this year to pay for all those things that keep popping up all the freakin' time). I close the thermos. I pick up the cover for my cup. I reach for my coffee. I wear my coffee....3825 3825 3825.

Ahhhhhh...it's like i never left. There's something comforting the familiar...isn't there?